As well as solo masturbation, introducing mutual masturbation into your relationship can be a lot of fun — and also great for showing your partner how you like to be touched and what works for you. But, in many instances, talking about masturbation with your spouse can improve your relationship. So, should you tell your partner you masturbate? And if so, what will that conversation look like? Common Concerns About Masturbation in Marriage Many misconceptions about masturbation persist, even though evidence indicates that it is a normal, healthy, and even beneficial act—regardless of relationship status. 1 These misconceptions can cause you to draw incorrect conclusions about what it means if you or your partner masturbates. Figuring out how to do it better yourself can result in discovering something that you can communicate to your partner, which makes your joint experience in the bedroom that much more enjoyable. Remember, just because your partner masturbates doesn’t imply dissatisfaction with your sex life. I know it might feel personal, but many people, my husband included, masturbate for various reasons. While I can understand why you may be feeling this way, the fact that your partner is masturbating doesn’t necessarily mean that there’s something wrong in your relationship. The truth is that masturbation is a perfectly normal and healthy behavior and it isn’t unusual for people to masturbate regularly whether they’re single or in a relationship, or if they’re having regular sex. Masturbation is common and usually healthy. By talking about it openly, you remove secrecy, reduce guilt, and invite your partner to know the real you — which is the foundation of intimacy. Masturbation itself is rarely the root of the feelings. First, I want to make sure you know that your feelings are valid and it may be time to dig a little deeper. Is it that your partner is masturbating or is it the feelings that come up because of the masturbation that really have nothing to do with the act? Do you feel unwanted or undesirable? Remember that masturbation is normal and healthy. It can be a little awkward to talk about at first, but there’s no reason you shouldn’t be able to talk about a basic need like this with your partner. In fact, as awkward as it may sound, talking about masturbation can actually improve your relationship! Whether you have walked in on your partner masturbating or you are wondering if your partner masturbates, here are some pointers for having a conversation about masturbation with your partner.